Dating takes courage. If you’re going to put yourself out there to get the person of your dreams, it’s worth doing a little homework. Consider this your one-page study guide.
Mike and Nick on our communications team put together this quick guide for crushing your first date, from asking them out to saying goodnight. We can’t guarantee these will all work; there is some risk involved. Maybe this risk is worth it?
Asking them out:
It can be tempting to act differently to get them to say “yes” to the date. But remember your goal, you’re hoping to find someone who likes the real you, so trust yourself and be yourself.
Are these clothes clean?
How does my breath smell?
Give yourself a look over before approaching your future date so that you know you are presenting your best self.
Call or ask them in person
It can be tempting to ask someone out over text messaging. Texting them is taking the easy way out. Your date will appreciate the extra effort of calling or asking in person.
Brainstorm date options
If they say “yes,” and ask, “what do you have in mind?,” what do you have in mind?
Have a few date ideas ready before approaching them so you don’t have to brainstorm too much on the spot. Be open to collaborating on the date idea if they want to be involved in the planning too. If you know some things about them, make sure what you’re doing is something they will like. For example, don’t take someone who only likes dramas to see Sausage Party.
Before the date:
Bring your best self
Try to feel and bring your best, most authentic self. For some people, this may be exercising a few hours before the date, and for others, it could be wearing their favorite pair of jeans. Prepare yourself by getting your mind and body ready to be comfortable so you can be the best ‘you.’ Maybe even listen to some of your favorite songs to help get you pumped up.
Make a special gift or bring flowers
Nothing says I care about you and this date than bringing flowers or a small gift. Maybe it’s making them a playlist or bracelet. This may seem small, but these gestures go far in showing them that you care.
Fill the gas tank
Be prepared. Fill the gas tank, clean out your car, book reservations if you need to, bring extra cash, and purchase tickets ahead of time so your date can go as smoothly as possible.
During the date:
Be in the moment
It can be tempting to check your phone and text messages. As much as possible, try to be in the moment with your date and keep your phone tucked away (best left on vibrate).
Show you are interested
Sometimes we get advice to “play it cool,” and maybe there is something to that. But it’s dangerous to be “too cool,” so make sure to show you’re interested. After all, you asked this person out!
Avoid feeling pressured
Holding hands, kissing, going back to your place…keep anything you’ve seen on TV, the movies, or heard from friends out of your head while on your date. Do what’s comfortable to you and respect your date.
Bonus tip: Get a trusted friend involved so you have some support. This could be someone from a class project, teammate, close parent, or lifelong friend. It’s important to have someone there for you to talk to, however the date goes.
Grab some breath mints and you’re ready to go! We hope you’re feeling a bit more comfortable and prepared to nail that first date. If the date doesn’t go as well as you had planned, don’t be too hard on yourself. There are plenty of fish in sea, and going through a few bad dates helps you appreciate the great ones even more. Tweet us @AfterSchoolApp, we’d love to know how it went.